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Want To Know What Men's Challenges With Women Are?

If there's one thing that will get you what you want not only in your love life but in your day to day life as well, it's the ability to understand others.
So often we end up feeling emotional about something and firing off at a man or someone for what they've ‘done' to us when in reality we're just tired, fed up or simply overwhelmed with what's going on in the moment.

Once you can learn to STOP and consider the perspective of the other person BEFORE giving your side of the story, you'll be far more likely to get the outcome you want.

Now, mature men have problems too, just like women. If you can learn to embrace them and to see them as the masculine side of him you fell for in the first place you'll become a rare and special woman to him trust me!

So here are a few common challenges that men face:

  • He may feel isolated and lonely if he's not got good relationships with men that he can talk too. Men do feel isolated and unable to share their vulnerability so try to help him share his feelings with other men.
  • How does he be the strong provider and in his head all day and then the soft sensual understanding man at home? This is a REAL challenge for many men and can leave them feeling drained by this shift of energy
  • They can try to become significant in the world and then find no-one really cares. This strong sense of desire to be respected and to be the powerful man can lead some men to risk cheating on their partner, to need excitement or to be constantly productive. A mature man will deal with these in different ways to an immature one.
  • Men need to zone out so they can have the intense moments of productivity. Not to have to talk, to just be, this is heaven for a man, whereas for a woman it can feel empty
  • His need to make you happy is a primary force but when you share your frustrations he perceives this as his failure. The key for you is to learn how to share your feelings in a way that will inspire him to want to give you what you need.

How to inspire him:
One great way to get what you want from a man is not by talking to him but by pushing him out to do the things that are important to him. o if your guy loves to go to he gym, out cycling or whatever does it for him rather than trying to talk it out right there and then, get him to go off and do the things that will have him come back to you feeling good about himself and ready to talk if that still feels important.

Emotional Overload
This is such a common experience for many men and just causes them to shut down.
Now, this is often not a reflection of the people around them and more importantly of you but as all of us women know we can feel rejected - just be clear, this is not his intention. It's not about a man not caring about you.

If you start to expect that a man will feel this way at times and concentrate on saying LESS, not more, you'll be more likely to have him come closer to you and want to open up. The more you say, the more he'll be likely to withdraw.

If you're having a tough time and are feeling emotional and you want to talk to him about something, recognise that you sharing and wanting to connect will likely make him withdraw. When this happens we can simply try to say it louder and add more ‘stuff' into the pot to make ourselves heard and guess what, yeah, he'll just withdraw even more. In these situations no-one is directly communicating and saying what they need.
If you get upset, he gets upset and then it gets out of hand.

When a guy is overwhelmed or see's negative emotions he's just going to want to escape that feeling, not necessarily escape from you but to his ‘freedom' place. He needs more space to feel good.
Now remember this is the opposite for a woman. The more you feel he's not responding the more you want to push him to talk because that would be what resolves it for you.

In an ideal world he'd want to be able to say one thing have it all be fixed and sorted and often he thinks that's what you're looking for, whereas you may not want him to fix anything, just be listened to and heard.

So before you say anything, stop and think about exactly what it is you want from him and then make a specific request, one that he can respond to and one he'll be able to fix for you

Be sure to check he's ready to talk, make an appt with him if necessary and then be clam and clear because if he's not ready to hear you you'll get no-where fast.

Seek to understand him first so you get understanding.

 

 

 

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