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What Kind Of Man Do You 'Think' You Want?

One aspect you may not have considered up until now are the ‘trade offs' we unconsciously make when we choose certain qualities in a man.

This certainly came as enlightening info to me when I first came across it and I hope it will do the same for you so do read on....

Understanding a man's strength's and weaknesses will allow you to have a greater sense of compassion and acceptance of him.
If you've got a tick list of the strengths you want in a man I want you to write those down and then.... and this is the interesting bit...
Write down all the weaknesses or possible negative sides to those strengths. For example, if you like a man that's powerful and holds down a well respected job he may well have controlling tendencies. If you want a man that's considerate he might expect a lot in return.

So, to get really clear on this write down the top 5 qualities you want in a man as his strengths and the next to them think about what the down side or weaknesses to those qualities might be.

I dated a man who was always very honest and whilst this was definitely (and still is) on my top 5 qualities in a man the downside to his honesty was that he often said a little more than was helpful or necessary which upset me in situations.

The same man was also highly focussed with work and providing for his family (that he was separated from) but in turn his ability to remain focussed and provide meant that he had trouble switching to dealing with his emotions. This can be a common problem for men. On one hand we want our men to be strong, to provide and take care of us, but then when they walk through the door at the end of a long day we also need them to be able to switch to a softer more vulnerable man who'll listen and express himself. These don't go hand in hand unfortunately!

So, take the time to really know what strengths and qualities are important to you and to look at what the flip side to those may be.

There are trade off's with each and every quality and by becoming aware of what they are you'll have a greater understanding of your man and an ability to cope with situations that crop up.